THE STARDUST CRUSADERS GO ON A ROAD TRIP

another crackfic! enjoy <3 this is gonna get chaotic 😈

btw this takes place after sdc and everyone is still alive

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"EVERYBODY GET IN THE FUCKING CAR!" jotaro yelled, from the backseat of the honda. "yeah yeah, lemme get my 9 step beauty routine and hair curler." kakyoin said while shoving random shit into his suitcase, including a banana, bag of cherries, pizza, monster energy, and a "toy" (if you know what i mean 😏). 

"I'M COMING" pol pol yelled while he ran to the car carrying three huge baguettes. avdol calmly got in the car, shoving his bags into the trunk like a normal person. polnareff finally got in the car, holding his baguettes like a baby with kakyoin following shortly behind. 

"ok is everyone ready?" avdol asked. the crusaders responded with a nod and they left the holiday inn express parking lot. 

"OH SHIT! WE FORGOT JOESPH!" kakyoin yelled, panicking and looking back to the motel. "leave him." jotaro said bluntly. "ok, im turning back." avdol said, they returned to the holiday in express where they found joesph waiting outside, holding iggy in his arms. 

"fuck, we forgot that stupid dog too." polnareff said, "i hope he doesn't shit on my face again." "well too bad because you're stuck with him." kakyoin said.

 joesph got in the car, "DID YOU GUYS ALMOST LEAVE ME?!?!" joesph yelled, shoving iggy on top of polnareff's baguettes. "yeah, and jotaro wanted to not come back." kakyoin said, ratting on jotaro. 

 jotaro rolled his eyes while joesph yelled at him like a senile karen. "yare yare daze... this is going to be a long trip." jotaro said. 

"wait a second, where are we even going?" kakyoin asked. "we ARE going TO DISNEYLAND!!!!" joesph said with all the enthusiasm in the world. 

"yay! disney!" avdol cheered like a supportive parent. "WOOOOOO! DISNEY! I CAN GET MICKEY TO SIGN MY BAGUETTES!!!" polnareff shouted. "i can eat an overpriced churro!" kakyoin said. "GET ME OUT OF THIS FUCKING CARRR!" jotaro yelled while banging on the windows, trying to break out. everyone ignored him and continued ranting about what they would do at disney. 

halfway into the trip - 

everyone was really bored. and i mean REALLY FUCKING BORED. so kakyoin pulled out his bag of cherries. "does anyone want a cherry?" kakyoin offered. all the crusaders said no, so kakyoin popped a cherry into his mouth. 

"leroleroleorlerolerolerolerolero-" kakyoin's licking got cut off by a very angry jotaro who was currently going insane stealing his cherry and cherry bag and throwing it out the window.

"what was that for?!" kakyoin asked, watching as the car got farther and farther away from the bag of cherries. 

"avdol can we go back for my cherries?" kakyoin asked with puppy dog eyes. "sure" avdol said, turning back on the highway and causing multiple crashes. 

"OH FUCK HNWINXIX JXWnx2INI HELLPPPPPP" the crusaders yelled while they crashed and broke 2918918 bones. "well well well, look what we have here." a cop with long crusty white hair and a stupid purple hat thingy said. 

"hellpppp" the crusaders called weakly from their destroyed honda. abbachio the cop didn't give a fuck about their injures and arrested them for vehicle manslaughter and reckless driving. 

the crusaders broke out of jail with their stands, stole a car, and continued on their road trip, leaving iggy behind. (because i forgot to write him and im not gonna go back)

2/3 into the road trip -

"hey avdol, can we put some music on?" polnareff asked. "yeah what do you want?" avdol asked. "can you play party rockers by lmfao?" polnareff requested. "yeah sure" avdol said, putting it on. 

"PARTY ROCKERS IN THE HOUSE TONIGHTTTT EVERYBODY'S GONNA HAVE A GOOD TIMEEEE" everybody but jotaro sung. after a while of singing they finally arrived to disney. 

"oh my god. this is the first time i will ever be so happy to see a stupid fucking mouse." jotaro said, stepping out of the musty stolen car and staring at mickey mouse. "WOOOO DISNEY!!" the rest of the crusaders yelled. they enjoyed the rest of their trip to disney. 

THE END <3

Authors note: this was so fun to write! thank you blackcherry088 for giving me this idea! for some reason i can't link their account but if u want to find them just look them up <3 byeeee <3


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