seven

I think my reaction to Will telling me his sister was dead, wasn't so bad, for the following days we talked more frequently. Aside from that I had the feeling that Will opened up to me ever since our ink heart talk and that his moods calmed down.

Halloween had come closer with big steps and I liked my friends, really, but right now they were the reason I didn't lay in my cozy bed with a book or watched a horror movie with Liv.


"Come on, Tessa! It's time to have fun. At the end of the night you will thank me", Jess had said as we entered the enormous house that looked as if someone had dumped a box of Halloween decorations on it. Sophie had emitted a cheery laugh and had followed Jess onto the dance floor. Traitress.


I currently sat on the side of the living room and watched my friends showing off their spacy dance moves. I rolled my eyes in amusement and let my gaze sweep through the room, only for it to land on a familiar person with black and white hair. James! Does that mean Will is here as well?
He was definitely not standing next to James and when I searched the room for him, I couldn't find him. Sigh.

Suddenly someone slumped down on the seat next to mine, I turned around and surprise! there was Will. He wore a compassionate smile on his face and then asked over the loud music: "Do you want to get out of here? I was on my way to driving somewhere else and you don't exactly look comfortable." He tilted his head and looked at me pervasively.


I nodded to express my gratitude and he took my hand to lead me through the crowd. I tried to ignore the prickling in my belly or the goosebumps on my arm. Hopefully he didn't notice my sweaty hand.


But Will didn't let go because he was disgusted and he didn't say anything until we reached his car. He held open the door for me and when we were both inside, he informed me that we were driving downtown.


*°*°*
I hated Will and cursed myself for leaving the party where at least I couldn't plunge into death. I voiced my concerns about how steep it was and that I could resign dying so young, but Will assured me there was no fall hazard whatsoever. Pfft, as if. Idiot.


We sat on the roof of the bookshop Will worked at. Yes, that's right. On a roof. In the middle of London. 50 feet above the ground.


"How come you have the keys to the shop if you're only an employee?", I asked Will. Compared to him I was cramped and tense.

He released his grip on the roof and circled his wrists. "Oh? Did I forget to mention my parents own the shop?" His voice sounded a bit too innocent for my taste. I turned around and there it was: a smirk on his lips.


I gasped. "That's amazing!", I exclaimd enthusiastically. "You can read whenever you please, that's great!"


He merely nodded in amusement. "Do you know why I come up here?"

I acted surprised. "Does that mean you have an actual reason, aside from the fact that you have a death wish?"


"I come here to think", Will said, ignoring my words. "The stars help me sort out my thoughts."


I automatically raised my head to look at the sky. Facing the canopy, I felt so little and unimportant and suddenly I wasn't afraid to fall down anymore.


The stars shone much brighter than in New York. However I supposed that their luminosity was much stronger on the country, far away from the city lights.


"Wow", I breathed, incapable to manage anything else.


I felt that Will moved next to me and suddenly I was aware of the comfortable warmth his body radiated.


"I'm here rather often to think about my sister's death. I shifted my weight to be closer to Will, with my hands still on the roof, of course. "I know that I'm not actually responsible for her death, but it still feels that way." He spoke with a choked voice and in the moonlight I could recognize something wet glittering in his eyes.


My heart cramped. There was so much pain bottled up inside of him. I wanted to ask Will why he thought her death was his fault, but I didn't want to pressure him. At that moment I contemplated telling him about my father, but he had already continued talking.


"You should feel honored, you know?", he whispered. I had no idea why he whispered but I followed suit.
"And why is that?" I had unconciously come closer.


Will looked into my eyes and leaned forward as well. "Because you're the only person, aside from James, I have ever opened up to so much. Because for some reason I have a feeling I can trust you."


By now we were so close, I could feel his breath on my face. Our lips were mere centimeters apart. A little bit of leaning forward and we would kiss.


My heart pounded hard in my chest as I waited for Will to close the last bit of space between us. I was captivated by his presence and his blue eyes were the only thing filling my horizon.


But then I remembered that we had just talked about his dead sister and we backed away at the same time. In his eyes I could read that he didn't think it was the right moment either.

*°*°*
We went back to the party and in the car my thoughts attacked me. We had played down the tension between us and then climbed off the roof.


I couldn't stop thinking about his blue eyes that had been all I had seen. About his lips that had been mere centimeters away from mine. Simply thinking of it made my heart go full speed and made my belly tingle.


The fact we had both backed away at the same time showed me that we had the same train of thought and the same opinion. A kiss wasn't appropriate if we had talked about his dead sister some seconds prior.


I felt hope boil inside of me. If he thought like me he wanted to kiss me too. I clutched onto the thought, knowing in the back of my mind that it was only october, we only knew each other a few months and we still had some time.


In the next few months a lot could happen. But at the moment I concentrated on the party ahead of me. I had promised Will to dance with him, the anticipation almost killing me.


I realized that here, in this car, there was another person with a heart of ink.


If Will succeeded at having fun at a party with unbearable students and music that was way too loud, I could too.


I felt strong, for I wasn't the only one who prefered books. I understood now that I wasn't alone. I had Will and we had our hearts of ink.

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