I had been Ink's toy for twelve years and a month. I had accepted that I would never be saved; there was no use to resist it. Once I had accepted it, the pain was easier to take; it wasn't something that was opposing me anymore. Now, the pain was simply part of my daily routine; I had no reason to fight it. I had also accepted that Papyrus wasn't coming for me; that was the hardest part, but I got over it. He didn't care, just like all of his new friends. That wasn't a crime, and I still loved him; I just couldn't see him. He didn't have to rescue me; he's still the best, even if he didn't save me. My friends were saddened when they heard that my hope was gone, but they accepted it, too, after a while. Now, they just tried to keep me sane; that was all that was left. Losing hope wasn't as bad as I thought it would be; I merely showed less emotion and care towards a lot of things. I expected nothing, and I received nothing. It was simpler that way; I wasn't suffering as much as I used to. It was currently a bright new day, and Ink had just woken me up; I tried to be a bit more positive about my situation, since it would never end. I wore a small smile as I woke; that helped keep me a bit more sane.

"Good morning, Dusty!" Ink greeted.

"Good morning." I returned.

"Did you sleep well?"

"Yep."

"That's so wonderful to hear! Would you like to see your babysitter while I'm gone today?"

"Yeah."

"Okay! I'll have him called to watch over you!" 

"Okay."

"Are you going to be good today?"

"Yep."

"You're such a good Dusty!" Ink patted my skull; I actually kind of liked that now, strangely. "I should be back at noon, okay?"

"Okay..where are you going?"

"An AU is resisting. It'll be dealt with..the hard way." 

"Oh.."

Ink then left me to hug my Hope, which I hadn't given up. Even though my hope was gone, my Hope wouldn't leave me. Fell came rather quickly, and I greeted him with a smile; he didn't know whether to feel happy or sad that I had lost hope, since my reaction to it was a bit unexpected. He sat next to me slowly.

"Hey, kid." Fell stretched a bit; he usually didn't get up this early.

"Hi!" I hugged my Hope.

"You doing okay?" 

"As good as can be expected..are you okay?"

"Yeah..just barely missed being sent out to battle."

"With Ink?"

"Yep. One AU has been resisting with everything they have; I feel bad for them, honestly. Now, they've got Ink after them, and, well..it just won't end well."

"I hope they'll be okay.."

"I do, too.."

We continued to talk about random topics for hours, and it was really relaxing; it was nice to relax for a bit in my everlasting torment. I wondered how my brother was doing; he's the best. Even if he wouldn't save me, I still loved him; it was his life, not mine, and I shouldn't have expected so much of him! It was wrong of me to do that, and I realized that now. Ink was gone for much longer than he had predicted, and when the clock struck six, it was honestly interesting. I didn't really have much care for Ink, since he tried to hurt my brother, but the fact that he was gone for so long was..curious. I wondered what was taking him, but I didn't dwell on it for too long - he wasn't hurting me. Fell and I were still talking when the time hit eight o'clock - a portal opened ten minutes later, and a disgruntled dictator hit the ground; he didn't look so good. He wasn't moving, and he surely wouldn't be getting up anytime soon with his injuries; I simply let him be - conversation was much safer than investigation, and Fell agreed. We continued to talk for two more hours, and it was now ten o'clock; I was getting a bit tired, since I had gone to sleep at nine o'clock sharp every night for the past twelve years. Pretty soon, a few guards came in and laid Ink on his bed.

"Sir?" One of them wasn't confident. 

"What?" Ink looked like he was in a lot of pain.

"The AU was successfully conquered.."

"Good. Make Dusty go to sleep and leave."

"Yes, Sir."

The guards soon approached me, and I lay down; I was tired anyway. Fell said goodbye before leaving with the other guards, who looked rather injured themselves; the universe they conquered must have put up a large fight. I felt bad for the universe's inhabitants; they didn't deserve to be conquered, nor did anybody else. The fact remained that they were, though, and nobody could change that. I fell asleep rather quickly, descending into a dusty nightmare, and I enjoyed it. It was easier to sleep at night when I had accepted my situation; I was simply destined to be hurt, and I couldn't change my destiny. If I was to be tortured for the rest of eternity, I could accept it; there was no use in fighting anymore. There was no purpose for fighting anything anymore. I simply couldn't do it. If I was eventually rescued, I would enjoy it, but I wouldn't expect it anymore; I expected nothing to change. Ink would probably keep me forever. When I woke up, it was morning, and Ink was still asleep; that was unusual, but he was injured. I simply enjoyed my time of peace and hugged my Hope tightly until some high ranks entered the room and woke Ink up. 

"What is it?" Ink groaned.

"Sir, are you going to recover here?" An evil guard wondered.

"Yes, I am going to recover here."

"Do you have any orders while you do?"

"Ugh..take Dusty to the guard lounge, make sure he gets fed, and just do whatever the heck you want with him until I get back on my feet.."

"Yes, Sir!" The high ranks looked toward me, receiving a few whimpers.

The high ranks wasted no time in grabbing me and hauling me out of Ink's room; it would have been nice to leave if I wasn't simply being taken to a place where I would receive more pain. I didn't struggle - that was useless - but I did keep a tight grip on my Hope; in the event that I lost it, I would have been heartbroken. One of the mean guards took it for a month once, and I refused to even scream when I was being brutally tortured; it was then that I learned that I could even stop my screaming if I wanted to. When they gave it back, I was willing to oblige their requests for a reaction to pain. On the subject of pain, I was beginning to get used to large amounts of it; sometimes, I didn't even notice fractures until someone pointed them out, and they didn't even hurt! I wasn't quite sure what was happening to me. When we arrived at our destination, I was quite forcefully thrown onto the floor, and a couple high ranks gathered around me as I clutched my Hope tighter. The room was commonly referred to as "the guard lounge," which was really just a sort of living area for the high ranks when they weren't doing anything important; it had beds, food, and practically served as a home for whoever wanted it. Since Dream and the swapped Sans were high ranks, they were pretty much forced to stay there, no matter how much they would rather be anywhere else.

"What's the little guy doin' here?" A mean guard scoffed.

"Ink says we get him to ourselves while he recovers." An evil guard smirked. "No turns, no waiting, and no time limits."

"That's better than conquering!" A different evil guard chuckled. 

"O-or maybe we could..be nice?" The swapped Sans was in the room, and he wanted to avoid having anyone hurt me.

"Yeah, right." An average guard shook his skull. "Why don't we just send him to happiness land and shower him with hugs and kisses?"

"That sounds great!"

"It-It was a joke, you idiot!"

"He's not an idiot.." I mumbled, holding my Hope tighter.

"The little dummy speaks!" An evil guard laughed; I never really said much when the high ranks tortured me, apart from pleading, but I hadn't done that in years.

"Oh, really?" A mean guard leaned closer. "I wonder what he'll say if we do this!" He reached for my Hope, chuckling, and took it from my grip.

I said nothing, only weeping.

"Give it back to him!" The swapped Sans exclaimed.

"What're you gonna do about it?" The mean guard tossed my Hope to another guard.

"I'm going to scold you in a very stern way!"

"Oh, wow. I'm so scared. Somebody. Anybody. Help me."

"You're on your own, pal." An easy guard snickered. "I would never mess with the big, stern Blueberry who can't even put on a helmet right!"

"Quit it!" The swapped Sans crossed his arms. "Give him back his doll!"

"How about..no!" An evil guard caught my Hope and tossed it to the next; they were playing catch with it to keep it away from the swapped Sans.

"I say we make the most of this time!" The first evil guard grabbed one of my arms.

"I agree completely!" A mean guard stood from his seat.

"Here's to pain!" The evil guard snapped my arm, but I gave no response. "What the heck?"

"Ugh, he's done this before." The mean guard who once took my Hope groaned. "Give him back his stupid doll."

"Why?" An average guard, who was quite tall, was keeping my Hope out of the reach of the swapped Sans, who was about the same height as I was - short.

"I took his doll once. Refused to react. Ink got really mad, so I had to give it back. He didn't fight anymore."

"Aw, fine." The average guard threw my Hope over to me, and I picked it up happily.

The pain started soon after that, and I did oblige their wishes for me to scream; I had my Hope. The swapped Sans sat in the corner, hoping it would end soon; I knew it wouldn't. I clutched onto my Hope as the pain increased with every crack, but I didn't ever lose it; I couldn't lose it. The pain continued until I finally went unconscious, at which point, I couldn't delight my captors with my screams. It was sickening to think that the only reason people liked having me around was my reaction to pain; I couldn't fight it, though - I could only give them what they wanted. When I woke up, the pain started again, and I had to endure it. I wondered what my brother was doing; surely, he would be on some important mission for the resistance. Perhaps he was trying to save a conquered universe, or maybe he was retrieving secret information from an informant; those were nice possibilities to think about. I thought about my family as well; I hoped they weren't going to remain dead forever. I couldn't stand the thought of never seeing them again after so long, but I didn't really have a choice in the matter. After about a week of pain, the guards decided to give me a break. The swapped Sans wasted no time in checking on me.

"Are you okay?" He checked my cracks.

I nodded; the pain was bearable.

"Can you move anything?" The swapped Sans found more cracks than he would have liked.

"If he can, we could fix that pretty fast!" An evil guard grinned.

"Haven't you made him suffer enough?!"

"That's unheard of!" A mean guard snickered.

"Be quiet! You've been pummeling this poor skeleton for days, and he hasn't even fought you! Can't you give him a little peace?!"

"You just don't understand how evil armies work, berry." The diabolical guard entered the room. "When the person you're hurting fights back, you beat them into submission. When they don't, they're simply considered normal. Normal victims are fun to work with."

"No wonder Ink hasn't made you his right hand. You're just a meanie!"

"He'll give in eventually. I'm still the only one who's made top rank!"

"Probably 'cause he feels sorry for ya!" A mean guard laughed.

"Just you wait! I will get that title, and then I'll be in charge of all of you!"

"I'm pretty sure Blueberry has a better chance of getting that title than you do!" An evil guard joined the laughter.

"Heck, little Dust has a better chance, and he ain't even in the army!" An average guard teased.

"Yeah, right!" The diabolical guard wasn't having it. "He couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag!"

The swapped Sans was about to retort, but I stopped him; they would have just hurt me more.

"Eh, you're probably right." A mean guard shrugged. "Don't know why Ink thinks he's so special. Looks like a kid to me."

"I think that's enough break time." An evil guard stated.

"Probably too much." The mean guard had already pushed the swapped Sans out of the way.

The pain from the guards lasted for two months, and by the time Ink recovered, I had died twice. It wasn't pleasant to have my bones broken over and over, but I couldn't argue; that would have just brought more pain. As the years passed, I grew used to pain; that could never change, it seemed. No matter where I went, I would be hurt. No matter who was with me - if they were mean - I would be hurt. Nothing mattered anymore; I would just be hurt. I decided to simply live with it and hope for change, but I would never expect it. I doubted that I would ever expect anything ever again; it would just bring pain. That was what my life consisted of, wasn't it? Expectations were just not for me; I was better off not expecting anything than expecting everything. I shouldn't have expected anything to change. I shouldn't have expected things to happen in my favor. 

I shouldn't have expected at all.

~~~chapter end woot~~~

Dust bean sad.

Thanks for reading my expecting writing!

Bye!