The team wandered in a little while later, smiling at the sight of Reid and I on the bed. I smiled back at them, unwilling to let go even though I knew they all wanted to hug me too. They understood how these things went though; How overwhelmed a person could feel after a tragic event. So, instead of crowding around they supported me from afar and hugged each other. All they really cared about was the fact that we were all together again. Sure, we were a little shaken up, but we were safe and that was all we could ask for.

"You hungry at all?" Morgan asked.

I hadn't realized it before, but now that the idea of food was on my mind I couldn't stop thinking about it. I adjusted myself upright, still clutching onto Reid's shirt as I nodded my head and watched him leave.

"We called your parents," Rossi stated, "they should be here soon."

As horrible as it sounded I'd been so busy thinking about getting back on my feet that I'd completely forgotten about my parents. I let out a long sigh, feeling weirdly guilty for not calling them. Ever since I got here I felt too overwhelmed to even think about contacting them, which was strange considering how close knit we were.

Reid rubbed his hand along my back, turning his head to look down at my nervous expression. I looked up, meeting his gaze. I gave him a meek smile, snuggling back into his chest. The last thing I wanted do was let him go right now.

The group lingered for a little bit longer, eventually leaving once Morgan returned with a bowl of soup and some Jell-O. He set the tray out next to the bed, leaning over to rub his hand through my hair and kiss my head. I smiled up at him, saying a quick thank-you before giving him an uncomfortable side hug and watching everyone leave. When it was just Reid and I again I yawned.

"Want me to move so you can sleep?"

I shook my head. "Nah, stay here."

"Okay." He rested his chin on top of my head, continuing to rub my back in silence until eventually I heard footsteps at the door again. My parents, along with Issac and Maggie came in, rushing through the doorway. They immediately crowded around the bed, staring teary eyed in my direction. Mom reached out to touch me, resting her hand on my shoulder. I wasn't sure why, but the sudden rush of attention freaked me out. I moved into Reid, feeling my mom's hand fall away. She gave me a sad look, turning to my dad who stared over in confusion.

Reid sighed. "She's still a little shaken up."

"Oh, sweetie..." I knew mom felt bad. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt me. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," I responded quietly.

"We're glad you're safe," Dad added.

I glanced around at their sad faces, a frown forming across my face.

"You should rest," Reid leaned in close to whisper into my ear, "I'll talk to them."

I nodded my head, feeling his body slowly slide off the side of the bed. The second he was gone I had to stop myself from reaching out to grab him. I gave him a desperate look, watching as he glanced over apologetically and ushered my family towards the door.

"Hey," I called out. All of them turned to face me. I swallowed hard, pushing my hands against the mattress to straighten out my back. "I love you guys."

"Love you too," Issac smiled.

After they left I laid back down, clutching the pillow beneath my head tightly. Part of me couldn't quite wrap my head around the fact that I was no longer on the verge of being beaten to death. My body still ached, which was fine, but the pain I felt in my mind was astronomical. What if the team hadn't shown up in time? What if he did end up doing what he wanted? Would I be dead by now? Would he have kept me longer? I obviously knew I'd never get the answers I wanted. Kane Peters was gone now and while I desperately wished I could see him rot in jail I knew deep down he was better off dead.

Not long after I fell asleep. Surprisingly enough I didn't dream. Or if I did, I thankfully didn't remember. As I sat up from my slumber I groaned, slowly stretching my body despite how sore I was. I let out a yawn and covered my mouth as I blinked to adjust my eyes to the now darkened room. As I pushed myself completely upright I looked at the occupied chair next to me. In it, was an exhausted Reid, who's head was slumped over the backing of the seat. His mouth was open, breathing heavily as the arms across his chest slowly moved up and down. I cringed at the thought of how his neck probably felt, so awkwardly I scooted over, giving his elbow a light squeeze. Almost instantly he woke up, sniffing loudly as he fluttered open his eyes and sat up.

He looked around confused, until eventually his eye's landed on me. He placed his hand over mine, pulling it off his elbow, but still keeping a hold of it. "Hi," he mumbled.

"Hi," I smiled.

He smiled back, closing his eyes as he slouched into the chair.

"You should go home and sleep."

"Nah." He shook his head.

I frowned.

"I won't leave you again," he mumbled.

I pressed my lips together tightly, holding back the urge to smile. For a while I just stared at him, watching as he settled back into his sleeping position, this time looking less uncomfortable.

"At least come lay down then." I patted the mattress and moved over, taking my hand with me.

He said nothing and crawled in, carefully snuggling into my chest as he wrapped his arms around my torso. I groaned in pain at the weight, feeling him adjust to a more comfortable position. He glanced up at me and raised his brow. "Want to lay on me?"

I shook my head, running my fingers through his hair. "No, you're good. You need to sleep too."

"I'm not tired," he mumbled.

I couldn't help, but laugh. I raked my fingernails lightly across his scalp, earning a pleasant moan in response. My heart skipped a beat at the sound, causing me to hold my breath at the thought of how cute it was.

Apparently Reid noticed my excitement, because a small smile formed against his lips as he ran his hand across my stomach. As he did that I felt the space between my legs tingle. I cringed at the thought, awkwardly adjusting my thighs to try and mask the feeling. The last thing I wanted to be right now was horny, yet here I was.

"You're allowed to have sexual urges, you know," he mumbled, still smiling.

"I don't want them," I huffed in response. I hated how well he knew my body. Sometimes it felt like he had some sort of sixth sense thing going on, but instead of seeing dead people he just knew when I wanted to have sex. It was embarrassing to think about, especially given the circumstances.

The hand he had on my stomach trailed up my side, rubbing up and down as he pulled himself closer to me. I closed my eyes, ignoring the pain in my leg as he slid his torso upward. He moved his hand from my side for a moment, pressing his palm against the mattress to raise his face to my mine. His warm breath hit my cheek, steadily forming a thick tense fog between us. I swallowed hard, opening one eye to see him staring down at my lips. "What are you doing?" I asked.

He blinked and met my gaze. Despite his sudden confidence, his cheeks were warm, gradually turning a dark shade of pink as he licked his lips and continued to stare. Instead of repeating the question I just raised my brow, watching he his took a quick look at my chest before his eyes eventually returned to my mouth.

"Spencer?"

"Yeah?"

"What's happening right now?" The quickened heartbeat I once had was almost nonexistent. My whole body felt tight. I pushed my shoulders up against the backing of the bed, pushing my chest out at a ridiculous attempt to restart my erratic pulse. When I did that though, I felt his gaze move to my chest again. I blinked curiously, narrowing my eyes as he moved his head into the crook of my neck and kissed my collarbone. At that point I had no idea what to do. I tried my best to breathe; doing the classic in through the nose out through the mouth routine, before eventually giving up and pressing my lips together.

When he pulled he away he sighed, "I don't know." His once tender expression transitioned into a more confused one, his eyebrows knitting together as he peeled his body away from mine and sat completely upright. He let out a heavy breath and placed his hand carefully on my thigh. He ran his fingers along the skin lightly, glancing down to watch the goosebumps form.

"That doesn't really answer my question," I retorted.

"I, uh," he cleared his throat, "I don't know how to explain how I'm feeling right now."

"Horny?" I smirked.

He snorted, nodding his head slightly. "I mean, yeah, I guess. I just... I want you to feel good, you know?"

"Not really," I responded.

He released my thigh, letting out a groan as he brought his hands to his face to cover his eyes. He took a couple of deep breaths, throwing his head back against the bed as he pushed his hands into the roots of his hair and grabbed them. "I just want you to feel loved."

"I do feel loved."

He shook his head. "No, not like loved, more like loved, like-"

"You're literally making no sense right now." I laughed.

He groaned again, closing his eyes in frustration. Never in my life had I ever thought I'd see him like his. He seemed so flustered, like his brain had suddenly decided that this was the perfect time for a reboot. As he sat, I stared at his chest, watching it rise and fall as he took a couple more deep breaths to calm himself down.

"Take your time, doc," I responded sarcastically. I brought my hand to his shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze, "it's not like I'm going anywhere."

He snorted again, turning his head to give me an unimpressed look.

"What's that look for?"

He rolled his eyes, holding back a smile.

"Oh, my god, what is up with you right now?" I laughed nervously, shoving his shoulder away.

"I want to have sex with you," he blurted out. As he said it I felt my stomach do a somersault. Somehow even after he said I it it felt like a lie. Reid wasn't the kind of person to come out and say exactly what he wanted. He was more subtle than that; always throwing quick side comments and jokes into the air.

"Sex?"

"Yes."

"With me?"

"Yes."

"Right now?"

He rolled his eyes again. "Yes. Can you please stop acting like it's a big surprise?"

"It is a surprise," I stated.

"It really isn't," he argued, "did you know that over eighty percent of couples who break up end up having sex again?"

I screwed up my face in confusion. Even though I knew how much of a genius he was somehow I doubted the accuracy of that percentage. Sure, people made mistakes all the time, but eighty percent? There was no fucking way.

"Look," he sighed, adjusting his body so that it was facing mine, "I know we said we weren't going to rush into things, but after what happened," he paused, "I can't help, but feel like you deserve to feel loved right now."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked defensively.

He opened his mouth, stuttering a couple of inaudible words before eventually going silent and sighing. He licked his bottom lip and glanced around the room, his mind taking a moment to collect his thoughts before continuing. "I know how you feel."

"Do you?" I raised my brow.

He nodded.

"How?"

"Do you remember that conversation we had in El Paso? About how working as a profiler puts a target on our backs?"

I nodded, still feeling confused.

"Remember when you asked if it happened to me?"

"Yeah..."

"Back in 2007, we were on a case and I was kidnapped by a man named Tobias Hankel," he pressed his lips together, watching my confused expression sadden. "JJ and I were on our way to question him at his house when things went wrong and," he swallowed, "he, uh, he took me."

I frowned and grabbed his hand.

"He beat me," his chest shook as he inhaled a deep breath, "and then he drugged me and even though I'm getting better at coping I still think about it a lot."

"Spencer..."

He swallowed hard. "When I was there I couldn't stop thinking about how all I wanted was to feel loved." I bit my lip, watching as he brought his hand to the back of my neck. He thumbed the roots of my hair, twirling a couple of strands around his fingers as he gave me a sad sigh. "I don't know what happened between you and Kane, but I know it hurts."

I gave him a small nod. As much as I wanted to lie and say I was fine I knew deep down I wasn't. What happened in that warehouse would follow me to the grave. All the cutting and the choking and the touching would be ingrained into my body's muscle memory for the rest of my life. Just thinking about it made me feel dirty, like because of what happened nobody could ever love me anymore.

"Sometimes when a person undergoes a trauma it can trigger the body to release hormones that make you feel disconnected," he explained, "for me personally, after everything happened I felt completely unlovable, like nobody would ever want to be with me because of what happened."

I nodded my head. I couldn't bare to think of him feeling the way I felt right now.

"I don't want you to feel that way." He pushed his forehead against mine. "I know this whole conversation probably doesn't make much sense, but basically what I'm trying to say is whatever Kane did to you doesn't affect how worthy you are of other people's love."

I bit my lip and wrapped my arms around his neck. As strange and confusing as this conversation was it somehow made me feel better.

He opened his eyes. An innocent smile spread across his face as he moved to wrap his arms around my waist. After that he gently lifted me up, pulling me onto his lap with a small groan. "Did that make any sense at all or am I just crazy?"

I snorted. "Yes to both."

He rolled his eyes.

"I get what you mean," I replied, "as much as I'd like to admit that what he did doesn't bother me, it does. I can still feel his hands all over my body," I swallowed hard, "a-and it makes me sick, like I'll never be able to get rid of it."

He let a plume of air out of his nose as he brought my face to his chest. He tightened his grip around my body and rested his chin on top of my head. As we laid there together I closed my eyes, feeling the beat of his heart rapidly pound against his chest.

As terrible of an idea it was to have sex with him right now the thought refused to leave my mind. I knew his touch wouldn't get rid of Kane's. However, I also knew that that wasn't his intention. All he wanted to do was make me feel loved, like I was worthy of something other than pain and fear.

"Hey." I gave his chest a quick pat before pulling myself back up again. Slowly, I swung one leg over his lap, pressing the inside of my thighs against the outside of his. I swallowed hard, feeling a sense of nervousness bubble in my stomach as I gripped the top button of his shirt. I ran my thumb along the edge of it, letting out a heavy breath before pushing it through the hole and looking up at him.

His eyes scanned my face, ultimately falling onto my lips. As they did, he licked his own.

"Spencer?"

"Hm?" His eyes darted up to mine.

"Is this a good idea?" I asked, even though both of us already knew it wasn't.

"Probably not," he chuckled nervously.

I nodded my head. Despite his answer, I reached for the second button. Before I could grab it though, he took hold of my wrists and pulled me into him, reaching to grip the back of my head as our lips crashed together. When they did I almost passed out.