⚠️Warning: this chapter will be OOC (out of character); I tried my best to make my angst chapters not too heartbreaking for audiences (this is my first chapter to have a bad ending )⚠️

A/N: I'm sorry if I post this story late because I was really confused and it is complicated to end this story with a suitable ending since it is my first angst/sad story. Readers can still make requests until I announced that it will be closed at a short period of time. Please leave your suggestions at the comments section, thank you. God bless you all!

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Y/N's POV
Time: 15:30
"Ms. L/N, please prepare to memorize your lyrics after you have your lunch. Tonight you'll have two performances at 7 pm and 10 pm." the secretary said as she handed me some hard-copies and music sheets related to tonight's performances. Going through the music pieces and lyric sheets in your stand-by room, I felt my heart is sinking to the bottom as I read the notes from each bar, dynamic, and tempo.

The pressure will become stronger and it could only increase over time, moreover, not one single seed of confidence bloomed inside me. I felt empty, all I could feel is distorted mental pain...Ever since my parents died in a car accident, nobody supported or gave me advice like my parents used to do, that's why I felt devastated.

There's no point in living, today is the perfect day to die

I'd like to go out and have some drinks, so I got up from my seat and change my robe to an (f/c) hoodie and (f/c) pants. Then, putting on my (f/c) shoes before heading out to the famous bar, Ryusei. It was a comfortable environment with star-shaped lanterns suspended in the ceiling, enough to lighten up the darkroom. Vibrant pouches and beanbags are scattered across the floor like inflatable chairs while they also have a bartender station with tall silver stools surrounding the area.

Admiring the warmth in the station, I started to fascinate the elegant music and glistening wine glasses and transparent bottles of wine and other types of alcohol, each of them reflected light rays in different directions as quiet as a gust of wind. I took off my hoodie and sat on the table. "Excuse me, bartender, can I have a glass of (f/d), please?" I said as I folded my arms and let my head rest on them. When will this depression end? When will I find the perfect partner in my lifestyle to take care of me? Where will I be now if I'm with my parents? Those questions popped out of my head, not knowing how to answer or draw conclusions to them.

Fortunately, the thinking was cut by the bartender itself, "Miss...Miss...Miss~ Hello~ your (f/d) is here!" He said impatiently as he pushed the drink to you. I look up and surprisingly, he was a slim young man with brown hair and eyes, his flawless features and unique characteristics have caught my attention. Both of our eyes were locked in place until he flicked my head with his fingers to let me come back to my senses.

Third person's POV
"Ow! That hurts, you scumbag!"Y/N whined as she rubbed her forehead. "Excuse me I have a name and it's Morisawa Chiaki, okay? You better watch your mouth when you're drunk. It's kinda annoying because you will lose control-" Chiaki's statement was cut by Y/N's lips, Chiaki was shocked and tried to push the girl away from him, but she isn't resisting stealing a stranger's first kiss. Y/N made her way to create a french kiss with the helpless bartender, her tongue swirled in his wet cavern as she grabbed his necktie and move her chest closer to his. She then broke the kiss with a string of saliva connected to both of their lips. Chiaki wiped his mouth and yelled furiously, "What the hell is wrong with you, woman??! You're crazy!" Chiaki blushed over the overloading embarrassment he was having with the girl.

Suddenly, Y/N started to have a breakdown, tears are falling down her cheeks and she stuttered, "Y-Y-You don't understand how I felt...I-I just want to m-m-meet s-s-someone that can be my friend. WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE SO DIFFICULT! MY PARENTS ARE DEAD AND ALL I WANT IS TO MAKE FRIENDS AND LOVE SOMEONE, WHY IS IT SO DIFFICULT FOR ME, YOU SHOULD ALL BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES!!!" Chiaki's expression changed from confused then slowly became concerned to the girl, the pain inside her prejudice as she put her head down with both of her arms crossing the table. He took his blazers off and cover Y/N's shivering limbs and her puffy eyes, then he left his contact card and placed it beside her. Chiaki felt the guilty sensation: I shouldn't have shouted at her like that and should apologize to her, he thought, but he hopes that Y/N could find him someday, so he left the station and went back home.

Time:17:45
Y/N woke up and gently caress the Chiaki's blazer, why would that man give me a coat even when I treated him horribly, she thought. She then observed Chiaki's contact card beside her, thinking that Chiaki finally knows what she was doing and wanting to help and support her, moreover Y/N's only chance is to contact Chiaki and invite him to witness her performance tonight.

Y/N's POV
Time: 21:50
Clenching my fists on my chest and waiting for the velvet red curtains to open, I'm starting to assume that I'll start another chaotic freak show again. Even if I tried to stop becoming pessimistic, the negative thoughts won't go away. Suddenly, the phone vibrated continuously. I look at the phone and surprisingly it was a phone call from Chiaki. What is he going to say? Is he mad at me after I kissed him without any consent? Dang, I'm going to hell after this madness.

"H-hello? Chiaki?" I answered as my arms trembled in fear. "Y/N!!! Are you behind the curtains?" "Yes...why?" "BECAUSE THE PASSIONATE HERO CHIAKI MORISAWA IS THERE FOR YOU! DO YOUR BEST Y/N-CHAN IM COUNTING ON YOU!!!" My heart melted as he shouted, it is brought back to life again, which let me show my tint pink blush on my face as a result.  "I'm the burning heart Chiaki Morisawa! Count on me whenever you're in trouble!"

Finally, the curtains were separated from each other while the audiences make their presence in front of my eyes. I smile timidly at the wholesome comments coming from Chiaki, I looked at the crowd nervously to see if I spotted him. He was at the back of the crowd standing in the bar station, giving me a nod and glistening eyes me. I grabbed the microphone and began to sing (Song: First love by Hikaru Utada),

🎶最後のキスはタバコの flavor がした
ニガくてせつない香り

明日の今頃には
あなたはどこにいるんだろう
誰を思ってるんだろう

You are always gonna be my love
いつか誰かとまた恋に落ちても
I'll remember to love
You taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
今はまだ悲しい love song
新しい歌 歌えるまで

立ち止まる時間が動き出そうとしてる
忘れたくないことばかり wou

明日の今頃には 私はきっと泣いている
あなたを思ってるんだろう yeah yeah yeah

You will always be inside my heart
いつもあなただけの場所があるから
I hope that I have a place in your heart too
Now and forever you are still the one
今はまだ悲しい love song
新しい歌 歌えるまで

You are always gonna be my love
いつか誰かとまた恋に落ちても
I'll remember to love
You taught me how
You are always gonna be the one
まだ悲しい love song

Now and forever...🎶

The crowd gave a round of applause and began to chant my name, many of the people who come to the bar very often are impressed except for one person: a girl with curly hair was yelling uncontrollably at the crowd, she shouted, "Why is everyone so obsessed with her, the Y/N you see right in front of you is just a slut, A HEARTLESS WHORE! I have pieces of evidence that Y/N killed her parents, she was just a murderer who killed the innocents. I'm telling all you people, she has personality disorders and she is not a normal person. SHE'S A MONSTER! HER PARENTS DIED IN A CAR CRASH BECAUSE THEY THINK SHE IS CRAZY, SO THEY COMMITTED SUICIDE TOGETHER! IT DRIVES THEM CRAZY, YOU ALL SHOULD BE SCARED OF HER! "

The security guards at the bar dragged her out of the store while all the audiences (including me) stood there and watch her shrieking manically, some of them began to ask me questions. I glared at Chiaki once again: his forced smile on his face has faded while his eyes lost their passion for continuing life, Y/N could feel that her heart was full of cracks. Tears were forming in her eyes uncontrollably as she ran off the stage and close the curtains. The truth has been exposed and the friend that was loyal to her had lost his trust. Y/N sat on the shivering floor and cover her face with her arms and thighs as darkness enveloped her permanently.

Chiaki's POV
—Time skip until a few months after the event—(Time: 09:00)
It has been 3 months since I've heard Y/N's dark background story, I wonder what she'll be doing after the world turned its backs away from her. The memories from the incident are haunting until now, but I've decided to calm myself by watching some TV, everything is normal until I saw the subheading when I watched the news: 'A Terrible Sight: Teenage Singer Committed Suicide By Overdosing Pills'. The reporter then announced, "last night a 16-year-old high school female student named (L/N) (Y/N) has been found dead in her bedroom, consuming a container of illegal drugs named heroine when she went back home after she finished her  singing career in Ryusei café, the police assumed that the bottle itself contains her fingerprints and concluded this case to be a suicide."

'She is just a kid, why is everyone being judgmental about her, the world might be unfair but all they did is criticize her current status and physical appearance. She didn't do anything wrong.'

'The girl needs a therapist to comfort her at all times, not suicide by oneself. She doesn't deserve it. Although she doesn't seek help

'Just f*cking stop! Why does everyone need to be so mean to her, she's still human and nobody has the right to ruin her beauty and status!'

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The news sent chills to my spine, the tension vanished when there is a knock on the solid entry door, I gently opened it and my old friend, Midori was standing in front of me, holding a rose brooch/hair clip, a golden locket and a letter. "Chiaki-senpai, Y/N's secretary wants to give you Y/N's valuable possessions after she left the world. Tetora, Shinobu, and I found out that Y/N wrote a suicide note just for you. I think it's too late for her to confess her love to you. Specks of tears were forming on my eyelids, I grabbed the letter along with the hair clip/brooch and locket and started to read:

Dear Chiaki,
I do not think our friendship is going to last very long, although I still care for your attention and kindness towards me when we're talking at the bar, I got a strange sensation. Is this how people call this 'love'? It is weird at first because I felt I am not ready to build up my confidence and perform in front of a large crowd. That's why I like you so much, you are the highlighter in my life and I was a bland white paper, unfinished and average. You help explore the colors of the world, you make me feel that there is hope behind the clouds, this is the reason I was so happy that day.

I appreciated your compliments and wanted to spend time with you a little longer, however, the truth was spilled to the public, moreover, I was just a glass of high-quality champagne that lost its aromatic flavor over time, as if my fame would someday become my downfall.

This is why I decided to stay away from you, if I walk out of your bar, people will start calling me a monster. I know you wouldn't be happy and I wanted you to be in peace... it's my fault that I made you feel stupid and fluttered when you're around me. I shouldn't be the one who is believing there is love at the first sight, I shouldn't be manipulating you and myself. I'm sorry again and I hope when you are reading this letter, please forget about me. Just look at the sky, smile, and say goodbye to champagne problems.

Your best friend,
L/N Y/N

Chiaki sobbed quietly, the regret building up in his body and thinking about he was not able to save the ones who he loved, he was the one who drove him and her mad. Chiaki clenched on the hair clip/brooch and locket as tears finally landed on the crumpled letter on both of his hands.

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Note for song: 'First love' is a Japanese song about a girl (Reader) reminiscing about her first love(Chiaki). They've broken apart, though they've made great memories together. The one-shots mention that Chiaki hated her personality and also the truth behind the singer, Y/N will still love Chiaki from the bottom of her heart. Y/N is only an acquaintance to Chiaki, but she believes that he was his friend or possibly her soulmate, but this can only be in her dreams. Y/N regrets letting him go so easily and wishes she could have done something better to fix this breakup/problem.

Date finished: 17/1/2021