Amber woke up sitting in the back of the car. Mom and Mel were sitting on the front seats. They weren't saying anything right now, but Amber hoped that being in a car together at least meant they were talking to each other again. Like when they had first met, and Mom always seemed to be smiling after Mel's visits.

"She's awake," Mel said, without even turning round. He was driving this time.

"Are you okay, honey?" Mom called back, "We were worried about you there."

"I remembered something," Amber said slowly. She realised that even after she'd woken up, Orsertro's tears were still running down her face. She didn't understand why, or how, but it didn't really matter. She just knew that meeting had included so many terrible things, so many new things to learn. She hadn't even been able to understand half of the things Orsertro was thinking and feeling, and she was sure she wouldn't remember enough of the details to help the others. "There was a meeting. Madir showed us a thing, a totem. Was it real?"

"What kind of thing?"

"Was it real?" Amber repeated, doing her best to stop crying. She didn't understand, and she didn't want to explain. But she thought she could figure out enough on her own.

"It feels real to me. You worried all of us. Jack said it was like you just went crazy, you were going to attack him? And then you passed out."

"He wanted to... It kind of made me remember. I think? He said he was going to kill Ammadrine. Instead of worrying about what's wrong, and what's made us fight like this. Like, kill her and wait for next time instead of trying to work out what the problem is."

"Geez," Mel whistled through his teeth, "That's harsh. But I don't know, maybe he's–"

"No, you don't know!" Amber exploded, "You don't know anything. Because that's exactly what Belmadir said! You and your brother had this plan to kill Amma, because she thought she might be in love and you didn't know if that was going to mess up her powers. You didn't want to wait and see, you were just going to kill her and hope she doesn't have feelings next time she comes back. She was more human than us, and Nico and Madir couldn't take that, they thought they could use death like some kind of reset button. And you know what? I bet we're still trying to sort out the mess that came out of that. It's not because she had feelings that the demons got in, it's because you tried to kill her! Maybe she's the only one who's done the right thing all the way through, did you even think about that?"

"It's a guess," Mel whispered, "I don't like it, I wish we could work it all out. And you know, I don't want to kill her if there's any other way to do it, but... one of the memories I recovered was stepping out to challenge Ammadrine. She was trying to get into Orsertro's– into your room, sneaking around dressed like a human, and carrying a knife. I want to believe we can find common ground, but I can't believe she's the innocent one here."

"Couldn't she be trying to defend herself? Like, if she knows Madir wants her dead?"

"It's... how can we know? You have to listen, Amber. We can't keep fighting against each other while the Enemy's out there trying to kill us. And even if you're right, can you imagine what thousands of years on her own has done to her mind? You heard that laughing, I don't know if it's her or her host, but she's gone mad. There's nothing else that explains that gloating, or the monsters. Maybe they were just wild things out of control all those years ago, but she's using them now. And they're killing people."

"But–"

"I agree with you. I believe what you just told me. I was in on a plan to kill one of our friends? You know how that makes me feel. But even if I was on the wrong side a hundred incarnations ago, I'm not now. Whatever we've done in the past, we have to stop the one who's killing people now!"

"But..." Amber mumbled again, but she didn't know what she was going to say. There wasn't anything she could argue with. "I don't know, it feels wrong. I think we're missing something. I want to talk to her anyway, or talk to them both."

"They got away. And he had an item that was glowing with the power of several ancestral spirits, we're doing everything we can to work out what it could be, but we don't know anything about–"

"The Totem Doll? I saw that. Madir made it, it was supposed to trap Amma's spirit to stop her coming back until he could fix his memory changing machine, and make her forget all about love."

"So why's she... why's that guy carrying it around? She can't use her powers without it, or something?"

"It's her prison," Amber muttered, "She wouldn't have it if she could choose, I think that's pretty obvious. But maybe..."

"I think we're thinking the same way," Mel nodded slowly, "She's trapped in that crystal instead of reincarnating. But somehow, the guy can use her powers with it? But then why would he know who Nico is?"

"That's not quite what I'm thinking. But it's too weird. It would all make sense, but I don't think it's right. I don't want it to be."

Mel didn't ask any more. He knew that Amber was having enough trouble dealing with the memories of her earlier self, and he didn't want to make her face things she wasn't ready for. They were things that a girl of her age shouldn't even know about, never mind have to decide. She wasn't the right age for issues of life and death, that was for sure.