Book 8} The Forbidden Game
Chapter 64
Could Have Been Me
私にされた

~

I Built 
A Friend

~

"You'll... help me?"
he asked.

"Yeah. This is wrong. The more I think about it, the more I realize there's no need for us to be against each other.
We're both escapees. So we should be able to understand each other and cooperate
It would be better for both of us. So let's do that.
Let's talk heart to heart,"
Emma said.

"Shut the hell up. You'll help me? Who the hell do you think you are, kid?
You're bothering me for this? You gotta be kidding me, damn antenna girl!"
he yelled.

I flinched.
"I hate you! I hate all of you! I have no intention of talking, heart to heart or not! Now get lost!!"
he continued.

Emma was silent for a second and I knew she could only yell back.
"No!! You might hate me. You might want to kill me. But I'm not going to leave you alone! Let's stop this. There's no use in you hiding it. You won't solve anything by running. Tell him, Y/n,"
Emma said, not turning to me.

"You were in pain, right? You and your group were a good family too, right? And you loved your friends very much. When you lost them, you were sad. Frustrated. Full of hate.
You suffered a lot. And for years and years, you were alone...
Repeating everyday in agony and despair... "
I muttered, looking him in the eye as I spoke.

He looked stunned at the transition Emma and I did, but it was normally like this.

"What could you know?"
he asked with grit teeth.

"I don't know. I can only imagine... the pain of losing my friends and family. But still, I get it. I tried to tell you that earlier.
We're the same, right? The old you, and me right now. My family and your friends,"
I said softly, standing up next to Emma.

"That's why it's tough for you to look at us. And out of that pain, you pointed the gun at me. But we're not the ones you wanted to erase from your mind. It was the old you.
You might be able to distract yourself momentarily by getting rid of us. But in the end, it won't change a thing.
You'll still be suffering. And that's not good, so let's change it!"
I told him.

"Change what? How? Nothing can be done.
No matter how much I regret it, I can't change the past. And my dead friends won't return. Distraction is good enough. As long as you all disappear. You're right, you're just like me when I was younger,"
he said.

"You're the same as me. You can't save anyone from this hellish reality. You'll help me? What a joke. What can you do?"
He asked.

I took a deep breath, clutching my amulet.
"We can survive together. Let's live together.
We're returning to Grace Field within two years. You should come with us. To the human world.
I'm going to get the younger ones. And take everyone to the human world. Let's go to the world your friends wanted to see!"
I urged.

(Charmspeak at its finest )

I then looked down.
"We lost someone too. I told you about him.
He can't be replaced. He was our best friend... and always with us.
I'm sure he would've wanted to be here more than anyone.

But he can't... I let him go. He left me to handle the escape.
I'm going to go see the world Norman wanted to live in,"
I said softly.

"So you need to move forward too. For the sake of your friends.
We can't change the past... and no one can replace those who've died. But still...
We can carry on their will! Even if you're the last one standing, you can't stop. You can't give up. Your friends wouldn't want that.
And deep down, you don't want that either!"
I told him and his eyes widened.

He looked dazed for a second.
Then he shook his head.
"Leave me alone for a second. Please,"
He muttered.

(For those, who want sOmEtHiNg this is a small thing I'm doing before you get yeeted)

We nodded and I sighed, walking off.
Emma turned to us.
"I'm going to see if there's any more food I can get real quick,"
she said with a smile. Before I could respond, she was skipping off.

I sighed.
"I feel bad for Mister,"
I told Ray.

"I don't,"
he responded

I deadpanned making him chuckle.
He smiled and rested his hand on my head.

"Aish, fly,"
I muttered.

"Aish, butter,"
he smiled.

I then smirked.
"Why are you only like this when we're alone?"
I teased.

But I didn't actually think he would react.
His face turned red and he averted his gaze.
I tilted my head.
"Ara~ Ara~ Why so shy~?"
I giggled.

"Oh, shush, butterfly,"
he told me which made me chuckle.

"See? You act different,"
I deadpan.

"Shush,"
he said, giving me a glare.

"Oya oya, got it,"
I chuckled, taking his hand off of my head and wrapping it around my head, leaning my head on his shoulder as I looked at the tree in front of us.

"Ne, Ray,"
I then said, narrowing my eyes.

"Hm?"
He asked.

"Nevermind,"
I smiled.

He rolled his eyes but didn't say anything.
"Ne, butterfly,"
He then said.

"Hm?"
I asked.

"I... How'd you like kissing Norman?"
He asked with a smirk on his face.

My face went red
"Eh?! What do you mean?!"
I exclaimed.

"I saw you both, that day."
He said softly.

"Everything?"
I asked.

"I heard his confession to you. But I already knew everything so it wasn't anything new to me,"
He said.

"Knew everything?"
"His crush on you, I mean."
"Oh..."

"Y/n,"
I heard him gulp.

"What?"

"I'm not going to make a huge speech like Norman did. I'm not like that, it would be weird.
But I do like you. Like that too."
He said.

Heat rose to my cheeks and my heart started to beat fast.

"You don't have to respond to me,"
He then chuckled. I didn't say anything.
What could I say...? I didn't know my exact feelings for Ray...
The thought of love went away after Norman was gone.

What should I do?
I can hurt Ray by saying no. But I didn't even know what I wanted to say.

I looked up at Ray, he looked at me with a smile.
Either way, he would be happy. I knew that.

I got on my tippy toes (ha- short-)
And I kissed him gently like Norman did to me.

His eyes went wide but he continued the kiss, his eyes closing as he did.
His lips were warm and gentle, like Norman's.
God... I'm making a huge mistake.

I had my arms around his neck and his were simply around me.
I honestly don't know how long we were there, I didn't know if it was quick or long, I just knew that I would remember his kiss until the end.

He parted his lips from mine and chuckled happily, his forehead against mine.
I couldn't help but smile back.

"Where'd you learn to– Ray?! Are you crying?!"
I exclaimed.

He only continued to laugh, shaking his head.
"No, no,"
He smiled happily which caused me to smile back.

"And, books. To answer that,"
He said.

I chuckled.
"You nerd,"
I smiled.

Our joy was bright.
His smile was real.
Mine was too.
Even after, I could feel his lips.
Like I could feel Norman's
And it somewhat pained me.
But at the moment, I was happy.

(Okay-
Don't get pissed at me for this cuz Ray x Reader isn't the complete end–)

~

Emma rushed over to us.
"Mister is ready for us! And I got grapes,"
She smiled and my heart fluttered.
"All right, Emma,"
I said, taking the grape she handed me.

And we went back, Ray and I hand-in-hand.
Little did I know in the back of my mind, I was going CRAZY.

~

~

We came back to Yuugo soon, my face flushed and red.
The older man turned to us with a nod, then he looked at me.

Yuugo hugged me, which caught all of us off guard, and started to talk in a whisper.
But I could tell Emma and Ray were hearing everything.

"Turn back immediately. Don't go to Goldy Pond.
That place isn't good. This place is..."
He paused slightly, letting go of me.

Ray looked somewhere, his attention fading from us.
"Leave now. Tomorrow morning, they're gonna-"
Ray cut him off.

"Y/n! Get down!"
Ray yelled. I didn't get a chance to move away before I was pulled back.

Ray and Emma reached out to me.
I got Ray's hand, but mine slipped out of his grasp.

Ray's voice. Ray's expression.
Those are the last things I remember.

~

When I woke up...
"Urgh..."
I groaned, rubbing my forehead.

I sat up, looking around.
It was a very... upbeat place. I liked the colors.
"Where... am I?"
Another thing... I could still feel Ray's touch.

~
5.1.2020
Word Count: 1547