My week was off to a very terrible start. Considering I was hungover Sunday and got grounded, the days follwing were not good. On Monday I got my calculus test back, I got a D. When my parents asked me how I did, I made the mistake of lying, not knowing my teacher had already called them. Mom and dad were not happy with me. I also got written up for detention again on Monday. Long story short, my History teacher hates when we chew gum in her class. I forgot to throw mine out before going into her class. Mrs.George caught me and immediately gave me detention. Monday was an awful day.

Tuesday was now here and I was determined to have a better day than the past two days. Funny how when you get so determined and busy to make sure you have a good day, you actually forget other things. Like where you put your three page English paper. I got so busy looking for my paper, I didn't hear the bell ring and I was late to class. I now have detention for the second day in a row. At this point I will be grounded until graduation.

Unfortunately, Lacey wasn't at school today so I had no one to vent to. By the time lunch rolled around, I was more than ready to go home. I was opening my locker to put my books in it when a note fell out.

Meet me in the AV room for lunch?
-Nick

Reading the note somehow got a smile out of me. I was in no way going to vent to Nick but I could certainly use a distraction from the days from hell I was having.

After going through the lunch line to get my usual salad and bottled water, I was on my way to the AV room on the second floor of the school.

I was about to knock when someone else grabbed my attention.
"Taylor, hey." Phillip greets me.

"Hey. What's up?" I question.

"I was wondering if you have been there recently." Phillip gets straight to the point. I knew he would eventually come asking me this.

I take a deep breath before answering, "A few times."

"You could of told me, I would have went with you." Phillip says with a sad tone.

"I prefer going alone." I mumble.

"Lacey doesn't go with you?" He asks in disbelief.

"No." I simply say. That was one place Lacey and I hadn't been together in a long time.

"Taylor, you can't keep doing this to yourself." He sighs, running a hand through his dirty blonde hair.

"What am I doing?" I furrow my brows in confusion.

"Shutting people out. It didn't just effect you. Lacey and I are in this just as much as you. It will help if we-"

"If we what? Talk about it? There is no way I am doing that. And I know for damn sure Lacey won't either." I cut Phillip off abruptly. I was getting upset.

"Talking can help. You know it's coming up fast. We need to be there for one another." Phillip says calmly.

"I know it is coming." I snap. "Lacey and I would rather deal with it our way. We don't talk about it ever. It's easier that way."

"It isn't easier, Taylor. I can tell that you are hurting over this." Phillip says eyeing me.

"It doesn't matter what I am feeling." I huff and cross my arms over chest.

"You can't keep it in forever. Someday, you will crack." Phillip says before heading off in a different direction. "It isn't a bad thing, letting people in." He says when he turns a corner.

Thank God that is over.

I lean back against the wall beside the door to calm myself down. I hated having those kinds of conversations with Phillip or anyone for that matter. People always try to tell you how to feel or tell you that it isn't good to keep things in. Keeping things in was how I was surviving, it was better that way. Easier too.

I hear the door open and Nick pops his head out, "I thought I heard voices out here." He says. My heart drops, crap did he hear my and Phillip's conversation? "Are you coming in, cheerleader? Nick asks me. I just nod and follow him in to the AV room.

For a while Nick and I don't really talk, per my request. At first Nick was hesitatant to agree but eventually did. I could tell he wanted to ask me what was wrong but he never did. And for that, I was thankful.

There was no way in hell I was ever going to talk to Nick about anything related to the conversation Phillip and I just had. I'm pretty sure, Nick was finally getting a real look at Taylor Croft, he thought I was an open book. No secrets. Well, now he knows that isn't true. I had one huge secret and I don't plan on telling him anytime soon.

I couldn't help but replay my and Phillip's conversation over and over in my head. All he wanted to know was if I had been there recenlty, I answered yes. He didn't need to keep going. I prefer going by myself, it's easier, better, peaceful if I am there by myself. There is no one to judge me, or tell me I'm the reason we have to visit there in the first place. I never ask Lacey to come with me and she doesn't ask me to go with her. It was a simple understanding we both had.

Phillip told me that I push people away when it comes to that. I suppose that is true. Anytime my parents even think about bringing it up, I either shake my head no or run to the safety of my bedroom. One time my mom actually followed me up to my room and begged me to talk about it. I got so upset that I burst into tears as did my mom. From then on, my parents promised me they would only push if it was necessary.

"Are you not eating today?" Nick asks, shaking me from my thoughts.

I look down at my container still full of salad. The only thing I was doing was just pushing the contents around. I hadn't touched my water either. I put my fork inside the container and close the lid.

"I'm not hungry." I mutter and push my container away from me. I had no appetite, my stomach was all in knots and my head was pounding.

"Do you want half of my brownie?" Nick asks me.

"No." I frown.

"You have to eat something." He sounds concerned.

I narrow my eyes at him, "I am not hungry."

I wasn't in the mood to argue with Nick today. All I wanted was to go home and hide underneath my covers. My determination to have a good day was all shot to hell, so what else was left except to go home and pout the rest of the day. If I didn't have a mandatory detention to attend I would have already left school. The worst thing that will happen is my parents will add on to my three week grounding. That was mild compared to the shitty days I've had recently.

"Why do you sound mad?" Nick questions.

"I'm not mad." I say staring at my water bottle.

"You are lying." He says.

I was getting mad. "Why do we have to eat in here?" I ask. I guess I was getting a case of word vomit.

"What?" Nick asks confused.

"Are you that afraid to be seen with me?" I wasn't stopping apparently.

"No?" He sounded unsure.

"Anytime you ask me to eat with you, it's in here. Why can't we eat in the cafeteria?" I scowl.

"I don't know." Nick shifts in his seat.

"See, you don't like me asking you all of these questions. Now stop asking me if I'm mad." I huff.

"What the hell is wrong with you? I know I didn't do anything to you." Nick's tone turns defensive.

I groan in frustration, "I want to know why you refuse to eat in the cafeteria. Are you that afraid your girlfriend will find out that you actually like it here?" I snap back.

Nick doesn't say anything but I can tell he is fuming. I definitely took it way to far. I was taking my anger out on him when he didn't even do anything to me. He was just being a concerned friend. I felt bad now. Not wanting to stay in here any longer, I picked up my stuff and walked out the door without a second look.

I think I just ruined whatever friendship I had with Nick for good. All because I did something I always do. I shut him out.

- - - - - - -

Later that evening after detention I went straight home and threw myself onto my bed. I was way over this damn day. I allowed myself to sulk for a good fifteen minutes before changing out of my clothes and into something comfier. I also took my contacts out and put my glasses on. I then grabbed my English binder because I had a test and another paper due tomorrow.

I heard a knock on my door, removing my ear buds I said come in. My mom walked in with her blue scrubs on, she was probably about to leave for work.

"Hi, Tay." Mom greets and I give her a small smile. I wasn't really up for conversation but the look of determination on her face told me a different story.

"You already changed and took out your contacts." She notices.

"I wasn't comfortable and my eyes were itchy." I mumble as I continue writing my paper.

Mom nods her head. "I ran into Sharon Foster today." I drop my pencil and my heart drops to my stomach. "She asked about you, why you haven't been over to see her." Mom tells me with a comcerning tone.

"I've been busy with school and cheer, mom." I say looking down at my binder. The words were just blurry to me now.

"You told me you had seen her recently." Mom furrows her brows. Crap, I did tell her that.

"I talk to Phillip every now and then. I ask how they are doing." I shrug like it's no big deal.

Mom sighs, "I think you should go see her. You and Lacey both."

There was no way in hell I was doing that.

I stay quiet and my mom doesn't let it be. "Taylor, sweetie, if you want to talk about it, we can."

"There is nothing to talk about." I say trying to keep my voice from cracking but I fail.

Mom gives me a stern look then looks down at her watch. "I have to get to work. Your dad is downstairs in his office and Carter is in his room." She says.

"Have a good night, mom." I wish her.

Mom gives me a warm smile, "At least think about visting Sharon Foster. "

"I will." I say just to appease my mom. Mom gives me one more smile then leaves to head to the hospital for her shift.

I look down at the clock on my phone, only 6:03pm. This day was never going to end.

For the next half hour I planned on diving back into my homework but the recent conversations that occupied my day were all flooding back to me.

I felt bad for snapping at Phillip, he just wanted to help and I refused. Then there was my conversation with Nick. I felt even worse for being a Grade A bitch to him. I was trying to mold a friendship with him and I was doing a terrible job. He has never been mean to me yet I do it and it was the worst thing I could of done. I was going to have to apologize to him and Phillip.

Last was my mom. All she was trying to do was get me to talk, and I shut her out once again. Phillip was most definitely right and it irritated me to no end. I didn't know how many more times my mom and dad would be patiy with me. I was taking it for granted, that was for sure.

Another knock sounded on my door, I once again say come in. This time it was my dad. He was still in his clothes from work and was looking exhausted. Maybe he had a bad day too.

"What's up?" I ask as I put my binder back down.

"I order food from Leo's and I was wondering if you would go pick it up." He asks with pleading eyes.

"Sure. I could use a break." I sigh. This information wasn't getting absorbed into my brain. No matter how many times I read over the material.

"Thanks. I got your favorite, Five Cheese Ravioli, ligh sauce." Dad tells me and hands me his debit card.

"Thank ya." I grab the card. "I'll be back soon." I say grabbing my keys and leaving my room.

Leo's is an Italian restaurant about ten minutes from the house. It has been in our town for fifteen years and is very popular. Well, it is very popular by me, I love Italian food as does my dad.

When I arrive I see that it is pretty packed for a Tuesday night. I don't blame all of these people, I wouldn't want to cook either. Especially after a long day.

I walk in and head to the pick up counter where I tell them that I am here to pick up for Croft. The nice older man tells me that it will be a few minutes and to have a seat. I give him a kind smile and instead of sitting I stand off to the side

I was in the middle of taking a Snapchat when someone walks up to me.

"Hello." Logan greets with a smile.

"Logan, hi." I greet back.

"Are you waiting for a table? You can join Jay and I." Logan offers and points to a table near a window. Jay looks up and waves at me. I give him a wave back.

"No thanks. I'm waiting for a to go order." I tell him. I wasn't in the mood to really chat.

"Okay." Logan nods. "I wasn't really sure it was you at first, didn't know you wear glasses and you are in normal clothes." Logan laughs.

I look down at my outfit, black Nike joggers, a cheer shirt and flip flops. Yep, this wasn't something I wore out or often. "I was over my other clothes and my contacts." I shrug a shoulder. I was thankful that I left my make-up on and my pony tail looked decently messy.

"Have you talked to Lacey about me recently?" Logan blurts out.

"Uhh...no." I mutter. I knew exactly where this was heading.

"Oh." Logan sighs and puts his hands in his pockets. His green eyes filled with sadness. "I thought she and I had something. Guess not."

"Look Logan, if you want some advice-"

"Yes, anything." He cuts me off eager to hear whatever I told him.

"Okay." I say slowly. "Lacey is the type of girl to meet a guy and instantly fall for them. But once she sees something she doesn't like, she will no longer be all in." I explain. My bestie fell in love hard and fast but she also had a habit of falling out just as quick. If the guy didn't stand up for her then he was gone. Logan hasn't stood up for her recently. I was almost sure she was done with him.

"Are you saying she is done with me?" Logan asks disappointed.

I sigh, "If you don't show her that you are interested then she will be. Lacey likes a guy who will fight for her. Don't listen to what other people say." I advice.

Logan furrows his brows and that tells me he is in deep thought. I hear the man at the counter say Croft. "I gotta go."

"Thanks Taylor." Logan says then walks back his table.

- - - - - -

"Dinner!" I yell once I enter the house.

Dad comes out of his office and Carter comes running down the stairs.

"Thanks, Tay." Dad and Carter say.

"Alright I am eating in my office." Dad informs us.

"I'm eating in my room." Carter cheers.

"Carter if you ruin another controller you will be in trouble!" Dad warns.

Carter has a tendency to spill something all over his controllers. Mom and dad have bought him three in the past four months.

"I won't." Carter groans as he goes up the stairs.

"He will." I laugh.

"I won't buy him another one." Dad grumbles on the way to his office.

He will.

I make my way up to my room to eat and try studying for my damn test.

Ugh, is the weekend yet?