f o r t y s i x


"I ONLY CAME because of Penn and the promise of video games." Noah grumbles as he sits on my desk chair, his feet kicked up on to the top of a purple plastic storage box. I grin evilly and glance up at hime. "Liar liar pants on fucking fire


"I think the correct term is thank you." I explain as I return to painting his toe nails a vivid scarlet red. "Come on, a guy sent me eighty-five dollars through Venmo for feet picks. I need more money." 


"And why exactly are you using my feet?" Noah questions while he folds his arm. I hold the brush securely in my hand as I apply the red polish to his second toe. 


"Your feet are beautiful, Noah." I state as I glance to my right at Penn who was busy painting Noah's other foot in a dark plum. She nods with a cheeky smile. "I'll buy you gummy bears with the earnings." 


"Okay." Noah smiles contently as he locks his hands behind his head and reclines backwards. I can't help but giggle along with Penn as we continue to paint his nails. 


Everyone was out, since it was Saturday which meant Noah, Penn and I all on our lonesomes. It also meant that I was majorly third-wheeling today. Yay. Vera was in Madison with Sam who had come down to see her which was extremely adorable. He showed up to her dorm with flowers while Vera was sleep-deprived and in her pyjamas. Levi was also in Madison but he was meeting with his therapist which he does every Saturday. 


And Chase was in Seattle visiting his grandfather. I don't know much about Chase's grandfather and I'm not going to pry either. I've learnt that with Chase, I need to wait until he himself is comfortable to tell me which I'm fine with. But what I do know is that he owns a successful architecture company which Chase is hoping that he will someday be apart of. 


 We end up having a full photoshoot in my dorm with Penn holding up my desk lamp to Noah's feet while I snapped some Instagram-worthy pics. Noah did have very feminine feet which was a perk for me and all the creepy people of the internet. 


After we had cleaned up our mess I was lying on my stomach of Chase's bed while Penn and Noah retreated to sitting my bed. Noah lay back against a sitting Penn, his head against her chest and her phone resting on the top of his head as she swiped her fingers over the screen. It was too cute. 


"Maybe I should sell feet picks." Noah says as he stares down at his toes as I roll my eyes and giggle at him from across the small room. "Do you think I could make it in the industry Penny?" 


"Of course." Penn smiles as she combs her fingers through Noah's blonde hair. It made me miss Chase. I hadn't seen him since yesterday evening because he left early this morning. "I would buy your feet picks." 


Noah grins as he runs his hands down her thighs, "And that's why I love you." 


"Whoa, whoa, whoa. You guys have already said the 'L' word? The big L? The extremely serious and lethal word?" I question as I turn to them, highly confused as they look at me like I just said the dumbest thing on earth. I mean, I usually do so their expression was nothing new. 


"We've been together for almost three months." Penn explains as Noah nods along. Holy shit, it's been that long already? "And besides, we only said it about two weeks ago, right?" 


"Yup. I said it first!" Noah explains proudly, "It was so romantic." 


"You said it after you fell down the stairs in Arlington and had blood running out your nose, but sure it was romantic, sweetie." Penn explains truthfully and I can't help but laugh at Noah's disappointed face. I could picture the entire scene perfectly in my head. 


A knock at the door echoes through the room and I drop my phone onto the mattress before rolling off the bed like the log I am. I pull at the waistband of my jeans as I walk to the door, pulling the creaking wooden slab open.


"You have mail." A young boy with shaggy brown hair and a Dodger's cap greets as he passes me a simple white envelope from the basket in his arms. 


"Uh, thanks." I say before I slowly closing the door and turning around to the happy couple laying on my bed. I frown as I glance at the blank envelope before turning it to the other side. It didn't have a name, but I read the address that it had come from. "Oh shit." 


"What's wrong, Hay?" Penn questions as I slowly sink to the edge of my bed, holding the envelope in my hand. 


I glance over my shoulder at them, "It's from my Dad." 


There was a slight pause of silence before Noah speaks, "Well that's extra as fuck. Why didn't he just send you a text? Wait, shit, is he one of those Amish people?" 


"My father? No way." I chuckle at the absurdity of Noah's comment. I play with the edges of the envelope. "I blocked his number and broke off all contact with him." 


Noah shrugs, "Hey, it's not that bad. Maybe he's dead." 


"Oh my god, Noah." Penn chides her boyfriend although I could see the hint of a smile on her lips. The best thing about Noah is that he will always try to make you feel better no matter what. Sometimes he'll just says the completely wrong thing and it'll turn out to be the best damn thing ever spoken on this planet. 


"What?" He pouts.


"Well, here's hoping." I grin before slowly opening the envelope. If I get a fucking paper cut then that'll just be the icing on top of the cake. Slowly, I slide it out and rest it on my lap. It was an invitation, printed in gold and black on a simple white card. Noah was right, this was extra as fuck. My hands were practically shaking as my eyes skimmed over the printed lettering. 


You are delightfully invited to the 50th Birthday Bash of Harrison Lauder on the 18th of January. The Cruise Line will be leaving from Cassidy Marine, Portland OR, at 5pm sharp so make sure your one board for a boat-load of fun. Dress code: Gold and Black. Bring a Plus One or a Bottle of Champagne. And be prepared for a night of fun!


I can't help but roll my eyes at the cheesiness of the invitation. Noah, who had crawled from Penn's lap and was now lying on his stomach beside me hums as he reads over the invitation with me. 


"Your last name could've been Lauder? Shit, imagine Chase calling you Lauder and not Jones." Noah then glances over his shoulder at his girlfriend, "Hey babe, what if we called each other by our last names? Owens, make me a sandwich." 


She gives him a dead look, "O'Conner, no." 


"Eh, it's not the same." Noah shrugs as he turns back to reading the envelope, "Well, are you going to go?" 


"I'm not sure." I shrug genuinely as Penn reaches out for the envelope which I extend to her. "I mean, I haven't so much as spoken to my father in six years. And now he's inviting me to his 50th birthday party?" 


"If it was me, I would go. Free food, free booze." Noah explains all the options and to be fair, they sounded extremely convincing. 


"You know, if that was on the side of a windowless white van, you'd cannonball into the back without a second thought."  I smile down at him as I rub the top of his blonde head. He grins up at me like the adorable child that he is. 


"I'm taking that as a compliment." 


"Noah is right though, Hay." Penn explains as she passes the envelope back to me, "Maybe it's time to extend the olive branch. But then again, this is coming from a girl who would rather crash a car through a living room than talk to her father so...


"I mean it would be fun....a free cruise ride down the rivers of Portland and I can drink as much champagne as I want." I try to convince myself as I stare down at the envelope in my hands, "It's just—fuck—what would I even say to him. 'Hey pops, where you been for the past six years' or 'fuck you, you sperm donor'?" 


Noah raises his hand, "One vote for the second one." 


"Just start by saying hi." Penn explains as Noah's hand slowly lowers, "You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow." 


"Did you seriously just quote All Star?" I question as I give Penn an extremely dead expression. She nods with a satisfied smirk as Noah jumps on to his knees and throws one of my throw pillows into the air. 


Then, he sings, "AND ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOOOOOOLD!"


♤♤♤♤


The sound of rattling keys against the wood of the door draws me from my slumber. I hear the door slowly creak open and I roll onto my back squinting through blurry eyes as light floods in from the outside hall. I could Chase's siholuette before the door is shut and locked behind him; the room returning to the black abyss it once was. 


"Everett?" I question into the darkness but I doubt it was comprehendible. I hear him shuffle around a bit, followed by the weight of his bag hitting the ground. "What's the time?" 


"It's almost three." He speaks quietly from somewhere in the room as the sound of his zipper echoes. "Why are you in your bed?" 


"Well, I thought if you came back you'd be so tired and want your space." I explain as I flick my bedside lamp on, just in time to see him pull his shirt over his head. The best timing in the fucking world. He drops the material to the ground, standing in front of me in a pair of navy boxers and nothing else. The golden light slanted over the ridges of his abs, the cords of his muscles and the prominent bones under his smooth complexion. 


"When it comes to you Jones, there is no such thing." Chase smirks down at me.He pulls back the covers, exposing me in only a thin black tank top and green underwear. I move over and allow him to slip under his covers with me. His skin was cold to touch but I welcomed the chilliness. The heater was on full blast in the room so I relish in the feeling of his chilled skin against mine as our legs tangle together. 


We lie facing each other, our hands lying between our faces on the surface of the pillow. I run my finger over his knuckles and the tendons on top of his hand. 


"I got a letter from my dad today." I mumble, my focus on his hands and not his piercing hazel irises, "It was an invitation to his birthday party." 


"What? Is he fucking six?" Chase chuckles and I smile, only slightly as I continue to trace shapes on the back of his hand. "Shit, I'm sorry." 


"No it's fine. There's nothing to be sorry about." My eyes flicker up to his as I exhale heavily, "I'm just not sure what to do." 


"Have you told you mom?" He questions as his hand envelopes mine and he begins to play with my fingers lazily. It was a sweet, simple gesture and it made my heart squeeze with happiness. 


"No. I'm not even sure if I should." I shrug as Chase brings my fingers to his lips and kisses them gently. 


"Do whatever you think is right, Jones." Chase mutters as he gives me a supportive, "But if you want my advice, I say take advantage of the asshole with everything you've got." 


I can't help but laugh at him as our single hand intertwines together and rests back against the pillow. "I like you, Everett." 


"I like you too, Jones." Chase says before I move my face closer to his and plant my lips on his. We make out, slowly and methodically, making sure to take our time as our hands run over the surface of each other's body; remembering every curve, every imperfection and every perfection. We do this for about five minutes; five minutes of nothing but small moans and the incoherent mumbles of each other's names. 


We do this because I think we were both too afraid to say what we were feeling. 


We were too afraid to say the other 'L' word. 



is it getting hot in here or is it the crappy heater in chase's and hayden's dorm room? 


honestly, it's probably both. 


i know the readers of my book. i know you guys. and i know damn well you're going to comment all the 'L' words to exist in any language.


so i'm thoroughly excited to see what you come up with. 


also; i'm posting this now because i'm not sure if i'll be able to post again for the rest of the week but i will try my damn best because you guys are so amazing!

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